Reflections-The Faith to Endure

Faith

Whatever your beliefs or religious persuasion, there must be something which moves you to feel that joy and hope in the midst of challenges and sadness. I believe in my Lord and Savior Jesus Christ. I believe and put my trust in him, through all circumstances and events I have gone through.  

My second son Aaron, had just turned sixteen and was diagnosed with multiple scoliosis – curvature of the spine. I was devastated, but he had to have surgery very soon. He went in for surgery, and it was successful - the spinal surgery. However,something happened to his internal organs and after a couple days they would not wake up. His intestine was perforated and he was dying – slowly being poisoned. They were unsure he could survive a second major surgery at the time. He did. His faith and trust in the Lord pulled him through that surgery, together with the unexpected miracle of a visiting specialist in that field from the UK - who happened to be on call. I prayed so hard, and I believed even when - after the second surgery he was not recovering as expected. He was due to have a third surgery with even less expectation of survival, and on that last day – his body finally showed signs of healing. My prayers were answered, as were his own.He spent eighteen days in the hospital, when initially we were prepared for 4 days.

During his time of recovery in his hospital room, I recall a day he looked at me and said faintly, “Mom, I just want to feel the air, can you open the window so I can feel the air, please”. The request was barely a whisper, he could hardly talk.He was hooked up to many monitors and tubes. I lifted the window and he stretched out a hand to it, as best he could. He was quite frail. Then he looked at me and said, “thanks mom I love you, you can have my Cadbury chocolate.” That was significant, because he said he was keeping that chocolate for when he went home. As I turned from him I said, “I will be back soon son.” My eyes were filled with tears I did not want him to see. My whole heart and world screamed out that this situation was bigger than me.As I stood outside his room trying to compose myself, his heart/pulse monitor made a sound, similar to those in the movies when someone dies. My heart stopped beating and I rushed in. I breathed out. Exhaling more, as I checked and he was alive. The nurses came to check before I could call them. They advised something malfunctioned.

It was simply too much to hold in. I left when he was settled. I needed the air. I needed the sun. I needed my son to be okay. 

My church was close-by and I went to see my pastor. I recall asking him if my faith and belief in Jesus Christ was failing me because I felt like I was losing my son. I had been holding back the gates to overwhelming tears, and I cried. For the first time in fifteen days which he was hospitalized I cried. My pastor reminded me that I was a mother first and foremost and my faith had nothing to do with the love and emotion I was feeling.

Jesus wept. The shortest verse in the bible is those two words. He wept when he went to see Lazarus his friend who had died. It is beautiful that scripture in the bible –John Chapter 11

Reflection

Its twelve years later and I can look back and see what I came through. We all came through. I had taken my mortgage to buy my home the year before his surgeries, and one year later to pay his medical bills, I had to refinance that mortgage. Things were hard. It was tough, but my son lived. There are many stories of my faith and his faith during the experience. We are blessed more than we know sometimes. In going through that time, I was able to face the next challenge life blew my way.

Whatever happens in life having faith and acting on that can be a miracle. What is endurance in living? It is a belief and faith which helps us endure our challenges and adversities to the point of accomplishment.

Walk in Faith - Be inspired!

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 Artwork: Artistree -andrew.innocent@hotmail.com

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